Pilot Holes

I look at myself
As if from a great distance
But finally
I gave up my resistance
There's an urge to escape
Something in me has snapped
Like a wild animal
I run when I feel trapped

There's an item missing
In my stock of little lies
I could tear our house down
With just a single smile
There's a question waiting
And it pierces me like knives:
Are we drilling pilot holes
Into the woodwork of our lives?

I blow out your candle
And you can blow out mine
Didn't Mommy tell you
You should never play with fire?
'cause it's dangerous
And the burns are shining through
Our sweaters and shirts
No matter what we do

Love is not (A) fair,
(B) reasonable and (C)
What I've done for you
Or what you've done for me
But you're one in a million
And it's too late for regrets
Two is company
And three is "place your bets"

Can I ask you something?
(I know you're about to leave)
If this is love, why do we
Sneak away like thieves?
But I stick to the rules
Until I have you back
The scent of your skin and
The mole upon your neck

Eyes closed
I lie awake in bed
Breathing hard
Busy hands and busy head
Finally get off
This train of thought and sleep
Lust is like a wave
And the trailing edge is steep

What now?
My thoughts all come to naught
I run away
In dreams of getting caught
Put my head on hold
If only I could write
Let stray dogs howl
And indoor cats be quiet